Spolioli and Azuga

My last batch of kitten fosters were so cute.  Well actually, when I first got them, they were the weirdest looking kittens.  Their ears were big and on the side of their head with long hairs sticking out of them.  Their eyes were big and their nose was a bit pointy.  What weirdos.  And to boot, Spolioli was polydactyl which means he has extra toes on his front paws.  Is it cute or is it weird?  Hard to tell.  His paws were white but he had black paw pads (toe beans).

It wasn't long before they grew just a bit and their cute personalities came out almost immediately.  Spolioli loved to snuggle.  When I went in to greet them, he would wrap around my feet and wait to be picked up.  As soon as I picked him up, he started purring so loud.  Azuga is the really pretty one but was a bit more shy.  Although both were always up for a nightime kitten pile in my arms.  Azuga was quite a bit smaller than Spolioli so my goals were to get them to weight and really monitor Azuga to make sure he kept growing.

Sideways Azuga (I called him Azu)

Spoliolio (I called him Spoli)

Spoli's extra toes.  This is  mid playing action.

They seriously gained weight every day and before I knew it, they were where they needed to be.  I scheduled their neutering.  But over the weekend, my friend contacted me saying they saw my posts on Facebook and wanted Azuga.  They had lost their kitty in April and Azuga reminded them of their kitty.  I suggested they consider both kittens since they are a bonded pair and that they come see them.  A few days later, they did.

These kittens had their full mojo going on.  They snuggled and squinted and loved pets.  They nestled in their arms.  They were pretty dang cute.  The family decided to think about it.  The next evening, I heard from them they wanted them.  Which was great because they were going in to be neutered the next day.  We were able to coordinate it so they didn't go out for adoption and would be held back for them to get them.

I quickly had grown to love these two.  I was so happy they were going together to my friend.  That means I will get to see them sometimes.  I still miss them every day but I am happy for them and for my friends, Kim and Mike (and Abby).

With their new Daddy.  Now named Maui and Hei Hei.
They look pretty happy to me.

While  I was fostering these two for almost 3 weeks, Bella was her usual curious self.  But shortly after they arrived, she started having terrible diarrhea and quit using the litter box regularly.  She was not eating like normal and slept ALOT.  After 2 weeks of this (and making her another litter box), I decided to check with the vet.  We did a fecal test that came back negative for any virus or bacteria.  We decided she probably has "Stress Colitis".  Since the kittens are gone, she is back to her normal crazy self and she no longer has diarrhea.

It is easy to assume  it was the kittens that stressed her out.  So I am taking a break from fostering to see how she is doing.  Mike and Kim are going on vacation in July.  I offered to watch the kittens for 10 days while they were gone so the kittens will be back in another week.  I will keep them separated from Bella and see how it goes.  If Bella gets the shits again, I am afraid I will have to give up fostering.  This makes me so sad.  If she doesn't get diarrhea, then something else was upsetting her and causing issues.  She is a curious cat and gets into everything so maybe it was some dish water, toilet water with cleaner in it, or some bug she found.  I hope it isn't kittens.

Happy Birthday to Me

Yet another birthday rolled around last week.  At this point, birthday's don't mean much to me.  And my birthday fell on a Monday which is usually a busy work day anyway.  But I did spend some time over the weekend celebrating with Mom.  She is such a sweetheart and came up to spend the weekend with me.

We went out for Mexican food with John before he headed out of town, got pedicures, played with paper, and even met Philip and Tiffany for Benihana.  In addition, my Facebook peeps sent me lots and lots of well wishes which was really sweet.  It was a great birthday.

Mom wanted to check out Trader Joes.  So we went there after dinner and checked it out.  I am still a Trader Joes novice but I do enjoy their flowers and fruit and veggies.  I got some roses and peonies.  And a Tuscan cantaloupe with prosciutto to go with it...just like the super fancy Italian restaurants do (Wedged cantaloupe with the skin removed, then a slice of prosciutto wrapped around.  A little drizzle of honey or olive oil....delish!!).  I'm always up for a Trader Joes run!!

Thanks for the happy birthday wishes.  I still can't believe I am 54!!!  I guess I am 53 and 13 months.  Haha.

Roses and Peonies.  Bella approves!

Pedicures

All done.  I tried teal green this time. 
Not sure how I feel about it even a week later.

What a goofy facial expression  Mom is always photogenic.

Tiffany, Philip and me. at Benihana

Lazy lips

So if I've seen you recently, you probably already know this news but since I am pretty much a hermit, I thought it would be good to share on the blog.

Either I've been watching too much TV or I am  just lazy and took advantage of an opportunity.  I choose the later.  About 1.5 years ago, I had my brows tattooed.  I consider this part of the radiation recovery process since my brow hairs on the right came in sparse and white.

On Valentine's Day, my favorite permanent makeup lady, Kimberlee did a special for lips.  I've been thinking about tattood lips for a while.  I don't know what came over me but I jumped at the sale and scheduled an appointment.  Just like the brows, you go in for two sittings where they basically repeat the same thing both times.

I won't lie, having your lips tattooed hurts like a sucker.  But Kimberlee worked really hard to keep me as numb as possible so it wasn't too bad.  It took about a hour of tattooing each time to get them done.  The first round didn't work out quite like I expected so we tried a different technique the next time and boy howdy, it stuck!

Kimberlee had a highly recommended color so we just went for it.  Turns out it matched my favorite lipstick completely!  So here is the photo.  Top pic is my natural lip.   Notice the upper lip not being even.  Middle photo is right after she finished.  The bottom is healed lips.

Honestly, it is incredible.  I don't have to worry about lipstick anymore.  No more coming off on the rim of a glass, or on my teeth, or anywhere else for that matter.  I do still use Carmex at night and sometimes as I dash out the door.  I also have chapstick with super lip sunscreen to protect me when in the sun because they burn pretty easy.  I have to say I love them.

I realized now that the only thing that needed makeup was my eyes.  I have blonde/white lashes.  So two weeks ago, I had lash extensions put on.  For those that don't know, they glue mink hair to each of your  lashes for natural yet black curled lashes.  Most people haven't even noticed I am wearing lashes.  So now I get to wake up to makeup.  I don't do a blasted thing.  And I love it.

Here is a freaky selfie showing the end result.   Not any of makeup.  Not too shabby.  Run a brush through my hair and I am out the door!

Faking Cancer

I have something on my mind and I just have to let it out before I burst.  But this is going to be one of those "things" that make you want to learn more and I'm telling you right now, I'm not going to provide more than I post here because there are people involved that I don't want to out their stupidity.  I can tell you it is no one that reads this blog or knows me well.

I learned recently that "someone" feels I faked my cancer!!  The motive, in their mind, was to keep Philip close to me all those years and keeping him "behaving".  I was absolutely floored when I hear this as every day I look in the mirror, I am reminded of my cancer journey from the scars that are visible down the front of my face and the dent in my eyebrow from trying to remove the tumor from my eyebrow twice.  Never mind the freckle on the back of my hand from all the IV insertions of toxic chemicals in that spot to administer the chemotherapy.  Let's not talk about the jacked up inside of my nose from my excellent surgeon trying to remove cancerous lumps from inside my face without a scar.  And let us not forget the 1.5" scar on my collar bone from removing my first tumor there.  Never mind the fucked up sinuses on the left side from the tumor that had to be removed twice and now my sinus drains into my left eye (party tricks available by blowing milk from my mouth through my eyeball).  Those are just the visible things.

Let's talk a minute about the invisible things like pain I still feel knowing I have cancer in my body that will never go away.  Or the look on my sweet 6 year old's face when I had to tell him his mother had cancer and try to convince him it is not scary and I WILL NOT ABANDON HIM.  Never mind all the times my cancer returns and I have to buck up and do additional treatments.  Let's forget all the scans and radiation I've had trying to beat back the beast that lives inside my body.  And because of all that, everytime I need an Xray, we (my doctor and I) have to face the tough choice of if it is "worth it" to add more radiation to my body (the answer is usually no) because we now have to track the radiation load my body has had to carry and won't go away.  Let's not even talk about all the pain my family and friends deal with the fact that I am sick and have this hard journey to endure.  All the potential dating partners that disappear when I tell them I have had cancer.  The countless sleepless nights I have faced trying to come to terms with all this and put it in perspective so I can keep going.

So instead of focusing on those stupid assholes that think I am faking it, I am going to focus on the fact that I must have done something right to overcome the mental challenge of dealing with a chronic cancer.  The fact that I am "doing so well" that people don't believe I have a lifetime of dealing with cancer.  To date, I will never hear that statement that any cancer survivor waits for...that they are "Cured".

See I think people believe that all cancer is swift and efficient in determining if you are cured or dead.  They don't know that there are cancers that have the ability to just keep haunting you just about the time you forget yourself that you have fought a battle for your life.  But there are such things as chronic cancers.  And I am fortunate or unfortunate to have one

I won't even pretend to know why my cancer seems to not follow a typical path for my type of cancer.  Even my Oncologist is surprised.  I should be getting treatment every 18-24 months as the cancer of my type typically returns that often.  Why I am getting 10 years remission?  Why am I currently 4 years out from my last terrible treatment that fried my eye area and damaged the skin around my eye.  Every day I am reminded when I look in the mirror and see the dent where a large and dangerous tumor once lived.  But I wash my face, look into my own eyes and smile knowing I've been given another day.  I might not be perfect but perfection is highly over rated.  Today I can breathe in the air, touch the soil, laugh with friends and family, give of myself, and relish in the fact that I am a cancer survivor one more day.

Next time I have treatment, I will make sure the sad assholes are very so aware of what I am going through.  Maybe they would like to drive me to treatment every day for a month.  Or see my medical file at my oncologist's office is 2.5 inches thick because "I made it this far". (September 20 will be 15 years since I heard those horrible words labeled as my diagnosis.  I am so thankful I have beat the odds so far and know I am way past the prognostics estimates.)

My final thought is a reminder to me and everyone else.  Please be careful judging others with your own viewpoint.  You do not know what journey that person has been on.  Be kind, Be helpful, or be quiet.  And to the "side swipe assholes", Be quiet with your stupid ass comments.  No one asked you anyway.

Enough said.  Thanks for letting me get it off my chest.