Almost immediately after I left Dr. L's office a few weeks ago, I noticed a thickness behind my left ear. I was really enjoying ignoring it but it is growing, is hot, and itches. So at Mom's urging, I made an appointment with Dr. L which happened to be today.
He agrees there is something there and it is weird. We also agreed it is behaving exactly like the one in my eyebrow behaved a few years ago. It started at a small "BB" and then got mooshy and flat and big. He said anyone else, he wouldn't think it was a tumor but with my history, we agreed it probably was....dammit.
So we are going to watch it for a few weeks. If it starts growing fast, we will move faster but for now, we want to see what it is going to do. We will probably biopsy it eventually to determine what grade it is. Then we will figure out a treatment plan. If it is aggressive like the eyebrow one was, we will have a much more serious and aggressive approach. If it is still slow growing like it was long ago, we can have less aggressive treatment.
It is always hard to ramp up for treatment again and of course, it is always disappointing to learn your cancer has returned. But I also know my kind of Lymphoma will always come back. I've had a solid 2 years cancer free. I choose to be focused on the positives. I've been living a pretty charmed life for 13 years with cancer, my body always seems to respond well to treatment, I have one of the best doctors around, and I am surrounded by people who love and support me.
I'm going to enjoy ignorance for 4 weeks and not give it much thought until I have too. During that time, I will gather my strength and be ready for whatever is around the corner. So I'll share more information as it comes up. In the meantime, lets play hard and run fast!
Tuesday, May 24, 2016
Friday, May 20, 2016
Burley Bound
I totally forgot to blog about this. Last weekend, Fritz invited me to join him at his son-in-laws birthday party. They have an absolutely beautiful home in Burley on the Snake River. I never considered the possibility of living right on the Snake River! But they do.
So I jumped in the car and headed up for a quick weekend adventure. I met up with Fritz and we headed over to the party. Kelli had made some fantastic appetizers. They also had an open bar and she made the best Sangria! I really enjoy Fritz's kids but I haven't got to spend much time with them so this was especially fun!
We visited and enjoyed a little libation. As we sat outside on the deck looking over the river, we watched the sun set. And before we knew it, it was dark and these youngsters were ready for more play. So what do you do in Burley? Well you jump in the car and head to the local dive bar in town. Of course, it was karaoke night! There were probably 20 of us at the bar. I never did sing but Fritz and the kids did.
So I jumped in the car and headed up for a quick weekend adventure. I met up with Fritz and we headed over to the party. Kelli had made some fantastic appetizers. They also had an open bar and she made the best Sangria! I really enjoy Fritz's kids but I haven't got to spend much time with them so this was especially fun!
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| View from their deck |
We visited and enjoyed a little libation. As we sat outside on the deck looking over the river, we watched the sun set. And before we knew it, it was dark and these youngsters were ready for more play. So what do you do in Burley? Well you jump in the car and head to the local dive bar in town. Of course, it was karaoke night! There were probably 20 of us at the bar. I never did sing but Fritz and the kids did.
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| Fritz and his son Matt |
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| Matt and Kelli |
We had great fun but I admit, I drank more than I should. Fritz did too. We were both not very bright bulbs the next day. But we had fun and it was great to be included in celebrating with some great people.
One thing that still puzzles me is the stall in the ladies room. They have swinging cowboy saloon doors to each stall (of course). But there were two big holes cut out. I was so puzzled, I took a photo. Is this an Idaho thing? Explain this to me please....
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| These are my knees as I sit on the pot. Not low enough to put legs through. Absolutely no privacy. I don't get it. |
Reality sets in
I have......9 boxes left to unpack(not counting scrapbook stuff). 9!! But that isn't an easy statement as these are the tough boxes of stuff I have no idea what to do with. I have about 1.5 shelves left for stuff and 9 boxes of stuff. I am going to have to start on them but I think I'm going to have to play a game with myself to make it through. Here are a few ideas:
Not sure which approach will win but I have a weekend open without many plans so it is perfect to move to action.
Once I have the house unpacked, I am going to go work on the storage unit. Those lovely movers stacked 4 super large and heavy boxes on top of each other in the corner. I would guess it is 45 feet tall (exaggeration but might as well be because I can't do anything with the stack as it is....maybe 7 feet tall) and each box might as well be 50 lbs each.
One little hickup in my giddy up is I am going to Moab next weekend and need to find my "glamping" (glamour camping) items. Who knows where the stuff is in this storage unit box of mess. Flashlight, step, beach towels, table cloth, garbage sacks, etc.
What I am realizing is once I get settled, I have no little projects. No organizing. No honey do projects. Notta! I've not found myself in this situation in....oh...like....20 years!! I am going to have to figure out how to be a lady of leisure. I could actually read books, watch movies, and enjoy hobbies without guilt! I can work on my friendships and make sure I keep my circle active with fun things to do. I could volunteer or do community things I've always thought were fun but too tired or busy to add. Hell. I could jump in the car and go on weekend roadtrips!! I have no grass to tend or weeds to pull. I don't even have a closet that will need cleaned out because it literally just happened.
It is an interesting reality....really. I do have a bit more more before I get there but it is coming. I hope I am ready. I've been planning this for years!
- Put them in a circle and play musical chairs but with boxes. When the music stops, the box must go.
- Work on 1 box a week. I will be finally unpacked by September.
- Work on 1 box a day. I will surely get tired of it and address the stuff by tossing it
- Take everything out and put it on the floor and stare at it until I am forced to address it (in September)
- Turn on my favorite "kick ass" music and dive in. The moving grit just has to stick around
Not sure which approach will win but I have a weekend open without many plans so it is perfect to move to action.
Once I have the house unpacked, I am going to go work on the storage unit. Those lovely movers stacked 4 super large and heavy boxes on top of each other in the corner. I would guess it is 45 feet tall (exaggeration but might as well be because I can't do anything with the stack as it is....maybe 7 feet tall) and each box might as well be 50 lbs each.
One little hickup in my giddy up is I am going to Moab next weekend and need to find my "glamping" (glamour camping) items. Who knows where the stuff is in this storage unit box of mess. Flashlight, step, beach towels, table cloth, garbage sacks, etc.
What I am realizing is once I get settled, I have no little projects. No organizing. No honey do projects. Notta! I've not found myself in this situation in....oh...like....20 years!! I am going to have to figure out how to be a lady of leisure. I could actually read books, watch movies, and enjoy hobbies without guilt! I can work on my friendships and make sure I keep my circle active with fun things to do. I could volunteer or do community things I've always thought were fun but too tired or busy to add. Hell. I could jump in the car and go on weekend roadtrips!! I have no grass to tend or weeds to pull. I don't even have a closet that will need cleaned out because it literally just happened.
It is an interesting reality....really. I do have a bit more more before I get there but it is coming. I hope I am ready. I've been planning this for years!
Wednesday, May 11, 2016
Girls like sparkly things
I think this is just so dang cute. Sissy loves her toys. One of her favorite favorite things is a her sparkle balls. They are actually pom poms with strands of glitter stuff in them. She is very partial to red. She likes the red balls, red blanket, red pillow. You get the picture. She carried this damn thing around with her everywhere. She even brings it to bed. And about 100 times a day, she bats it under the chair for me to get it out for her. She loved these balls at the old house but she really loves them here because we have hardwood floors in the common areas and red balls slide easily on the floor.
Both Baby and Sissy have had a tough time adjusting to the new house. We have been here just over 2 weeks and they still give desperate lost cries periodically through the day and night. They stay ever so close to me all the time. Baby seems to think she needs to go out in the condo hall. I think she thinks she is locked in a portion of the house and is just waiting to be freed to the other areas. They like their condo still but clearly miss the morning sunshine streaming in. I miss it too. The bugger about a house that faces south/west. They do like the evening sunshine though. Interesting enough, the building is designed just so I don't get lots of baking heat through the windows. That is kind of nice!
I'm still adjusting myself. The traffic noise is still an issue. I am slowly working on fixing the broken things in the house. Yesterday, I took Gorilla Glue to the microwave. It seems to have done the trick which is nice. Not sure how long it will hold but it is working for now while I figure out the microwave dilemma. Next project is to tackle the doors. They are all so heavy.
One really funny cat thing is they are really picky about their dry kibbles. They like a certain shape and refuse to use anything else. While I was getting ready to move, they needed more food. Much to my surprise, the store wasn't carrying the kind they like anymore. The only kind they had that with the right shape was weight loss formula. What the heck? So I bought it. Sissy is like a new cat again. She has lost quite a bit of weight. She has always been a hefty girl. She is so much more playful now. Baby on the other hand has always been a little on the thin side. She practically looks emancipated now. Her tummy is concave and she doesn't seem as active as she used too. I think she went too far to the other side. I got some new cat food. I think I will start mixing them together until the weight loss formula is gone. Poor kitties.
Both Baby and Sissy have had a tough time adjusting to the new house. We have been here just over 2 weeks and they still give desperate lost cries periodically through the day and night. They stay ever so close to me all the time. Baby seems to think she needs to go out in the condo hall. I think she thinks she is locked in a portion of the house and is just waiting to be freed to the other areas. They like their condo still but clearly miss the morning sunshine streaming in. I miss it too. The bugger about a house that faces south/west. They do like the evening sunshine though. Interesting enough, the building is designed just so I don't get lots of baking heat through the windows. That is kind of nice!
I'm still adjusting myself. The traffic noise is still an issue. I am slowly working on fixing the broken things in the house. Yesterday, I took Gorilla Glue to the microwave. It seems to have done the trick which is nice. Not sure how long it will hold but it is working for now while I figure out the microwave dilemma. Next project is to tackle the doors. They are all so heavy.
One really funny cat thing is they are really picky about their dry kibbles. They like a certain shape and refuse to use anything else. While I was getting ready to move, they needed more food. Much to my surprise, the store wasn't carrying the kind they like anymore. The only kind they had that with the right shape was weight loss formula. What the heck? So I bought it. Sissy is like a new cat again. She has lost quite a bit of weight. She has always been a hefty girl. She is so much more playful now. Baby on the other hand has always been a little on the thin side. She practically looks emancipated now. Her tummy is concave and she doesn't seem as active as she used too. I think she went too far to the other side. I got some new cat food. I think I will start mixing them together until the weight loss formula is gone. Poor kitties.
Friday, May 6, 2016
Just a boring update....
How is that for a title? I feel like all my time and attention is spent on getting moved in. Isn't it kind of boring when you ask someone how they are doing and it is the same thing every time? Well that is me. But I don't want to neglect the blog so let me see what I can muster to blabber about.
I am very slowly moving in. This week, I worked pretty hard on the kitchen and have made some good headway in there. I also worked on unpacking my clothes and trying to get them organized. Much to my surprise, I did pretty good with the closet space. It is a little ghetto fabulous but the important part is to get things put away right? One thing is clear....I have way too many Tshirts. I will be working through them with a critical eye and tossing anything that is shabby, stained, or fits funny. I also have the master bath in pretty good shape.
For Cinco De Mayo, my girlfriends invited me to dinner with margaritas. We had great fun and it was just what I needed. I've not seen them in forever so it was nice. And nice to get out and socialize after weeks and weeks of packing and moving. While we were eating, I invited my friend Lesley to come over for a glass of wine before book club. Seemed like a great idea but then I came home and looked around the condo and decided I better get busy because it was ridiculously messy. I'm working really hard to not just "shove" things away so there are still piles and boxes of stuff but there is a bit of room now and it looks a little better. This weekend, I'm going to keep going on my unpacking and see what I can do.
Philip comes home this weekend. I can't believe he finished his freshman year. He has decided that ASU was just not working well for him so he is coming home to Utah permanently. He is hoping to enroll in the U of U this Fall after working all summer to help fund college. I am excited to have him home but I know it will be very different after him being gone for 8 months. Lots has changed in my world too. We will have to learn a new way to be together as grown ups.
I saw Dr. L this past week. I've not seen him for 6 months which is great in the cancer world. Nothing to be concerned about and everything was pretty standard. I will see him again in 6 months. It is nice when I have these long periods of "no cancer". Frankly I forget I even have it. Someone will ask me and it is almost like a surprise. "Oh god yes. I do have cancer. Sorry I almost forgot." Can't beat that! That was always my goal.
Muscle wise, I am still really struggling after the move. My hips and arms are huge issues but I keep hoping I will heal when I get rest periods. I am enjoying not having any steps in the condo. I will have to keep doing steps elsewhere to keep those muscles but it sure is easier living!
So there you go. An update for you all. Hang in there and have a great weekend!
I am very slowly moving in. This week, I worked pretty hard on the kitchen and have made some good headway in there. I also worked on unpacking my clothes and trying to get them organized. Much to my surprise, I did pretty good with the closet space. It is a little ghetto fabulous but the important part is to get things put away right? One thing is clear....I have way too many Tshirts. I will be working through them with a critical eye and tossing anything that is shabby, stained, or fits funny. I also have the master bath in pretty good shape.
For Cinco De Mayo, my girlfriends invited me to dinner with margaritas. We had great fun and it was just what I needed. I've not seen them in forever so it was nice. And nice to get out and socialize after weeks and weeks of packing and moving. While we were eating, I invited my friend Lesley to come over for a glass of wine before book club. Seemed like a great idea but then I came home and looked around the condo and decided I better get busy because it was ridiculously messy. I'm working really hard to not just "shove" things away so there are still piles and boxes of stuff but there is a bit of room now and it looks a little better. This weekend, I'm going to keep going on my unpacking and see what I can do.
Philip comes home this weekend. I can't believe he finished his freshman year. He has decided that ASU was just not working well for him so he is coming home to Utah permanently. He is hoping to enroll in the U of U this Fall after working all summer to help fund college. I am excited to have him home but I know it will be very different after him being gone for 8 months. Lots has changed in my world too. We will have to learn a new way to be together as grown ups.
I saw Dr. L this past week. I've not seen him for 6 months which is great in the cancer world. Nothing to be concerned about and everything was pretty standard. I will see him again in 6 months. It is nice when I have these long periods of "no cancer". Frankly I forget I even have it. Someone will ask me and it is almost like a surprise. "Oh god yes. I do have cancer. Sorry I almost forgot." Can't beat that! That was always my goal.
Muscle wise, I am still really struggling after the move. My hips and arms are huge issues but I keep hoping I will heal when I get rest periods. I am enjoying not having any steps in the condo. I will have to keep doing steps elsewhere to keep those muscles but it sure is easier living!
So there you go. An update for you all. Hang in there and have a great weekend!
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